LETTER TO PROTEGES,ASPIRING PROTEGES, SONS/DAUGHTERS

Letter to protégés ,aspiring protégés, sons or mentees. I am privileged by the Grace of God to be called Daddy, Coach, Mentor by few people but the truth is that the relationship BTW a mentor and protégé is symbiotic and not parasitic, if not one person (usually the mentor will die) . Another truth is that a father knows his son/daughter , a mentor knows those who are his protégés no matter who is calling him mentor , daddy or coach. I have openly said that every body needs a coach ,every coach needs a higher coach and I personally, I don't have coach I have coaches that cuts across different spheres. Let me share how I treat my own coaches and mentors. 1. I check on them from time to time and not in an annoying way. Here is the reason: so when I need to seek for their opinion or advice ,it won't be like 'it is now that you need me that you are reaching out'. Nobody likes to be used! When u keep in touch when u don't need any advice or guidance , it makes them pour themselves into you when u need their thoughts 2. If I need to see my coaches in person, I don't go empty handed . I must have a form of gift . This is to prove that I just don't want to collect from you, I appreciate your effort in sharing what you know with me 3. One of my mentors, very popular in this country ,he has a general public space number . Then he has another number that is private ,after walking with him for a while, he gave me his private number ,he said call me anytime ( I don't!). Personally ,I don't send BroadCast message , let's now assume I do, I am smart enough to know that I should not abuse the privilege of having his contact, I will excuse his number from my Broadcast. I get a lot of broadcast from people , I find it joyful to block them on my platform. 4. I look for ways to grow the brand of my mentors: I have a mentor who is well known, and I felt his website name could we customised to his brand ,I did a domain name search for him, found out that his name is available ,paid the money for him and sent the name to me. Now tell me ,how he will not watch my back! On January 2nd, I hosted a free WhatsApp class that was oversubscribed ,we had over 200 people that could not attend . After the class,many said thankyou , some prayed , but one person chatted me up and said you have added value to me sir, next time when u want to host a free class, there is a certain platform you can host and you don't have to go through the rigour of adding people on your phone ,then adding them to the group for the class. He brought value to my table and instantly won a special place in my heart 5. I don't and will never ask my mentor or coach for money! You erode your value and pass a wrong information. If your mentor decides on his or her own to give you, that's another ball game and its honorable that way . 6. I don't pester my mentors to take me out for their events , if they do, I also don't tell them that I want to hold the microphone. You don't really learn anything while talking! 7. Mentors/ coaches are not daft people ,they can literally see through your heart, and know your motive for hanging around them. The more genuine you are, the better . 8. I don't maximise or use any contact of my mentors without their consent . The reason is simple ,if you do, and any problem arises or conflict ,where is the boldness to tell your mentor to resolve for you? 9. I don't compete with my mentors,I don't 'threaten' them ,one of the 48 laws of power says, never outshine the master! This is very true I need to stop now, though there are more things to share. Before you look for a mentor or coach, kindly have what you are bringing to the table and spell out your code of conduct before your mentor or coach. My name is Dr Shogo. I hope this letter Abi article makes some sense.

ATTEND THE JUNE EDITION OF EMCEE AND PUBLIC SPEAKING MASTERCLASS

Do you have a passion to speak? So many times after a presentation, an audience member approaches me and says, "I would LOVE to do what you do! How did you get started?" Due to the crowds of people and short breaks between speakers, I rarely have the opportunity to effectively answer their questions. Recently someone asked if I had information on my website on how to become a full-time speaker! What a great idea! well...EMCEE AND PUBLIC SPEAKING MASTERCLASS is one of the platforms i have created..you need to attend the next session note. it is not a class for crowd....limited spaces available. THERE IS ALSO GOING TO BE FREE PERSONAL PROFILE TESTING FOR ALL PARTICIPANT. what you will learn. 1. Basics of public speaking 2. Roles of an emcee in any event 3. Personal Branding 4. Power of photography in image making 5. How to make money from being an emcee 6. How to make money from public speaking 7. Audience analysis and management 8. Leveraging Social media to promote your speaking services and many more that you will not learn in Harvard University . Limited slots available. it's a training you don't want to miss. They way to become more valuable is by adding value to yourself.

UNITED NATIONS WORLD YOUTH SKILLS DAYS IN PICTURES

DR SHOGO WAS ALSO THERE,ENJOY THE PICTURES

ATTEND EMCEE AND PUBLIC SPEAKING MASTER CLASS

The spoken word has always been, and will always be, the most powerful medium to motivate people. However, the majority of people dread the thought of standing up in front of an audience and speaking. The fear of a possible ‘personality failure’, the terror of being judged on their public performance, can turn normally secure people to jelly. ‘I stood up to speak, but my brain sat down’ is a common, self-defeating mantra. ATTEND THIS MASTER CLASS AND GET THE CONFIDENCE YOU NEED FOR YOUR NEXT PUBLIC SPEAKING ENGAGEMENT

THERE IS SOMETHING YOU CAN DO

Have we all become so complacent and cynical that we don’t believe our actions make a difference? Does any action – volunteering, donating, voting, writing, caring seem meaningless? Have you given up hope in yourself, your family, your community? In 1804, Thomas Jefferson was running to the US President for a 2nd term. A paraphrase of his campaign can be stated in one sentence. ” I believe every American given the opportunity and circumstances will take care of himself, his family, and his community.” I firmly believe that about all of us. Yet in this time, in this place with these people when we should expect miracles, we have become mired in mediocrity and mindlessness (as opposite to mindfulness). If we are all capable and willing then the problem must be the environment where opportunity and circumstances are created that is at fault. Every day we face messaging from big government, big charity, big business that pats us on the head and whispers ” don’t worry, we will take care of that for you.” If it is in their interest they might try to take care of it and mostly fail. Usually they won’t really try because they know we don’t really have very high expectations of their intent. The only think that BG, BC, and BB rely on is that we have bought hook, line and sinker into the supposed convenience they offer. “Don’t worry about homeless, we will do that.” “Don’t fret about spending, we have it under control.” ” Don’t concern yourself about supper, we have peeled and chopped for you.” Unless we begin to resist the convenience, we will soon be incapable of thousands of actions that make our world a better place. You can become involved rather than absolved. What is most important to you? What is the smallest action that you can take today to change/improve the situation? On a scale of 1-10 (10 being highest), how committed are you to taking this small action? Your words tell us who you think you are, your actions show us who you are. Tell us about what is important to you and your smallest action taken today.

MASQUERADE

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king’s wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way. Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand! Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.

THIS IS FOR THE MEN AND WOMEN THAT LOVES THEM

This is For the Men - Gerald Rogers Shares Marriage Advice He Wishes He Had Before His Divorce

Sometimes marriage advice from those who are divorced turn out to be the most honest and insightful tips you'll ever find out there. When someone asks a happily married person the secret to their long or happy marriage, it is easy sometimes to trot out platitudes like, "I am lucky", "I picked the right person", or one-worders like, trust, communication, honesty.

However, when you've been through the flames, whether the marriage survived or not, it may give one a better perspective. Last time, it was once widowed and once divorced Stella Damasus telling women how to keep their men, [read here].

Another divorced motivational speaker, Gerald Rogers, recently admitted on Facebook that there were a lot of things he could have done differently to save his marriage, and advises men and how they can do it better.

And though I said this is for the men in the title, I think both men and women can benefit from it.

MARRIAGE ADVICE I WISH I WOULD HAVE HAD: By Gerald Rogers

Obviously, I’m not a relationship expert. But there’s something about my divorce being finalized this week that gives me perspective of things I wish I would have done different… After losing a woman that I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I would have had...

1) Never stop courting. Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love.

2) PROTECT YOUR OWN HEART. Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.

3) FALL IN LOVE OVER and OVER and OVER again. You will constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don’t take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her.

4) ALWAYS SEE THE BEST in her. Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can’t help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife.

5) IT’S NOT YOUR JOB TO CHANGE OR FIX HER… your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it’s what you wanted or not.

6) TAKE FULL ACCOUNTABILITY for your own emotions: It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy, and she CAN’T make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.

7) NEVER BLAME your wife If YOU get frustrated or angry at her, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU. They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were.

Allow your woman to JUST BE. When she’s sad or upset, it’s not your job to fix it, it’s your job to HOLD HER and let her know it’s ok. Let her know that you hear her, and that she’s important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you… DON’T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE’S UPSET. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion.

9) BE SILLY… don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier.

10) FILL HER SOUL EVERYDAY… learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED. Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen.

11) BE PRESENT. Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is.

12) BE WILLING TO TAKE HER SEXUALLY, to carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.

13) DON’T BE AN IDIOT…. And don’t be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid.

14)  GIVE HER SPACE… The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing…. (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.)

15)  BE VULNERABLE… you don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.

16) BE FULLY TRANSPARENT. If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING… Especially those things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don't know i she will like what she finds... Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light. DROP THE MASK… If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be.

17)  NEVER STOP GROWING TOGETHER… The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.

18) DON’T WORRY ABOUT MONEY. Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.

19) FORGIVE IMMEDIATELY and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don’t let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. FORGIVENESS IS FREEDOM. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.

20)  ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.

In the end MARRIAGE isn’t about Happily ever after. It’s about work. And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. Through that work, the happiness will come.

Marriage is life, and it will bring ups and downs. Embracing all of the cycles and learning to learn from and love each experience will bring the strength and perspective to keep building, one brick at a time.

These are lessons I learned the hard way. These are lessons I learned too late.

But these are lessons I am learning and committed in carrying forward. Truth is, I LOVED being married, and in time, I will get married again, and when I do, I will build it with a foundation that will endure any storm and any amount of time.

If you are reading this and find wisdom in my pain, share it those those young husbands whose hearts are still full of hope, and with those couples you may know who may have forgotten how to love. One of those men may be like I was, and in these hard earned lessons perhaps something will awaken in him and he will learn to be the man his lady has been waiting for.

The woman that told him 'I do', and trusted her life with him, has been waiting for this man to step up.

If you are reading this and your marriage isn’t what you want it to be, take 100% responsibility for YOUR PART in marriage, regardless of where your spouse is at, and commit to applying these lessons while there is time.

MEN- THIS IS YOUR CHARGE : Commit to being an EPIC LOVER. There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize. Your woman deserves that from you.

Be the type of husband your wife can’t help but brag about.